Happy November! Almost to the end of the year and I want to end it strong! It’s been quite honestly the craziest, yet most memorable year of my life. A woman’s saturn return is not for the faint of heart…

What I’m Adding:

1. WRITING

It’s insane that I used to write full-fledged novels at 12 and now I can barely write a sentence of a work in progress before declaring its trash status. I know what changed…the monetization of creativity, big girl jobs and tasks, the world seemingly ending every time I turn on the television. I am also compelled to blame One Direction disbanding, as for a few years of my life they provided enough source material to fill up a google drive of ridiculous, but loving fanfic. I might start by looking at the projects I abandoned and see if anything piques my interest. Not the one direction fanfic, that can stay locked away, although some of that was top tier.

2. READING

Another love of mine that has fallen through the cracks. In remembering that it’s ok to relax and it’s ok to indulge, maybe I will actually stick to my TBR this month. Currently, however, I can barely get through a page without thinking about all the “important” things I am not doing. Which is funny because when I’m doing the “important” things, all I’m thinking about is how much I just want to sit down and read. Make it make sense, please.

3. BOUNDARIES

I’ve tested this out a few times this year and ended up setting a few fires in the process. It’s hard, but I’m happier.

What I’m Subtracting

1. STUFF

I have too much stuff. I know I do. Healing my relationship with security and what that actually looks like has been a long road. (Ex. Believe it or not, is not necessary to have 20 of the same color pen incase something happens to one)

2. MEAN GIRL BEHAVIOR

It astonishes me that grown ass women still desire to participate in mean girl behavior. Are you not bored? Do you not have a hobby? YouTube has a shit ton of tutorials on things you do with your time that are not shitting on other women. With that said, I know I can only control myself and I know I’m not perfect. All I can do is be mindful of when I’m stooping low, when I’m being an asshole, or picking on somebody for no valid reason other than the thrill of gossip. There are so much more enjoyable and productive things to do.

What I’m Continuing

1. KNITTING & CROCHET

This crafting bitch is BACK baby. Granted, I can’t seem to stay on task for long enough before I’m chasing a new project while a WIP gets forgotten. Working on it.

2. NEGATIVE SELF-TALK

I’ve really done a 180 on how I talk to myself and my internal dialogue (or external dialogue depending on if I’m alone or not and like to talk to myself). I really have become my own little motivator. Sure, a negative thought passes through but it doesn’t last and linger like it used to and I’m never going back to that.

3. EXPOSURE

I had no social media in high school or college years - too ugly, too fat, too this, too that, supposedly. I’m getting over that by posting, and posting, and posting. I don’t really care if people like my stuff or not. I don’t really care if it “takes off” or not. It’d be awesome if it did. Who wouldn’t want the things they create and share to do well? To mean something to many? But ultimately, what’s most important to me right now is consistency and remembering what has always been true - it’s ok to exist and be seen.